Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Filling in the Blanks and Being Generally Sappy. Do with it what you will.



"I’ve got my ticket for the long way ‘round"

Well, here it is. I’m coming to the rapid close of my first year away from home, my first year of architecture school, my first year at OU. Oh, man. How do I even begin to sum up these thoughts? It’s been… spectacular. I head home in a little over two weeks, and it feels so surreal. I’ll be returning to my stomping grounds, the places I’ve left.

What will have changed while I’ve been away? More importantly, who will have changed? I guess if I’m going to be completely honest with myself, how have I changed? How have we all changed? It’s easy to grow with someone. However, when you spend months apart at a time, it can become difficult to grow together, and much easier to grow apart. It would be a lie to say that I’m not concerned about meeting my friends all over again.

Some of us have kept in touch better than others, but some of us have drifted very far apart. This is a cliché journey of life though, and as such, this will happen as it happens. I am looking forward to seeing my friends, however all of us have changed. I’m also looking forward to seeing all of my animals. Those of you who know me well know how I love my animals, and they also know that every animal I meet is “mine.”  J I can’t wait to see Fiona (my chicken) and my puppy (Gizmo!) and my kitties and scrappyandmizzouandfinnandsalsaandnachoandtheminisandramboandshannon and well you get the idea…

"The one with the prettiest of views"
           
            This year feels like it flew by so fast! I have enjoyed my work here at OU (UNDERSTATEMENT) and I’m already looking forward to next year. It’s an incredible thing to find something you truly love to do.

I’m not saying that I don’t have my bad days, because we all know that I have the “it’s-raining-and-I-hate-people-and-there-is-no-way-I’m-getting-out-of-this-bed” days, but I have lovely friends both here and away that never fail to encourage me on those days. I don’t always have the will to respond (those of you with any kind of depression will know how this feels) but know that I do see them and that I do love you. All of you. There are things you never get to know in life, and many of you will never know how encouraging your words really can be.

I digress. This year has given me some new insights, and, if I’m to sum it up in a "few" words… here’s a list of a few things I’ve learned, and not just the school stuff. The real life stuff as well. 

1          1.     Appreciate.
I recently found something that I wrote several years ago, and it said “start with the fundamental assumption that the only thing you are better than everyone else at is reading your own handwriting.” Past-Heather Rae knew what was up. Look around you. Everything you see was an effort of someone else (unless you’re outside. Then you can take this opportunity to respect a very intimate creator, whatever your beliefs may be). Each chair you sit in, each piece of art hanging mundanely on a wall, each street you walk, was someone else’s work. Not all of it is done well. Not all of it was made passionately. Remember that much of it was. Remember that every person you meet has a passion, as obscure as it may be. Learn to appreciate that fire in them, and they will learn to appreciate it in someone else. It’s a beautiful circle.

2          2.     Make memories, not albums.
Many of you know that I’ve recently treated myself to a nice new camera. While this is true, and I love finding things to photograph, I’ve learned that not everything has to be documented. Not every laugh needs a picture. Not every word needs to be written. We have a society of instant sharing, viewing, clicking, copying, pasting. Realize that your life is your own, and while connecting with friends and getting likes on facebook is great, don’t cheapen your experiences by whoring them out to the world for “likes.” Keep them close to your heart, and keep them safe. They are the things you will tell your grandchildren someday, and there will be no picture worth the emotional words you might say about your long past memory. Also, there are maybe two people who care about what you’re eating for lunch today.

3          3.     Money is not that important. I promise.
Many of us have recognized the craziness of our system that says:

Go to college. à Pay lots of money. à Get a degree no one cares about. à Fight for a job that you don’t even like. à Sit and stare at calendars of your hobby and wish you could pursue it. à Can’t afford it because of education. à Be miserable.

How many people do we know who have followed this cycle? You know at least one. I know many. While it takes time to learn what happiness is and how to achieve it, and while you should be careful with your money, please, never, never, pass up an opportunity to do something you are passionate about simply because of money. Pinch pennies. Find a way. Remember those memories I was talking about? You won’t regret it.

4          4.     If it hurts, stop it.
I’m not really sure this needs explanation. To sum it up, don’t waste time with things that are not going to improve you, your life, or those around you worth improving. This can be interpreted many ways, so try not to be narrow minded about it, like I used to be. Weigh the growth versus the pain. Be honest with yourself when doing this. Ask someone you respect for his or her opinion. Then the hard part; listen to it.

5. Love yourself second.
Try to find at least one person or creature you care for more than yourself, one that you will sacrifice time and energy for, even if it comes with little or no appreciation. This doesn’t have to be an openly devoted thing. They don’t even have to know, and they especially don’t have to understand. Try to do at least one thing you wouldn’t have to do for someone that has no obligation to you. This is an age-old concept. There’s a reason for that. Try it.

"It’s got mountains, it’s got rivers, it’s got sights to give you shivers"

That seems like a long enough list for now. Maybe I’ll add to it later. “Rules of Heather Rae: Filling in the blanks.” As for me, I plan to spend the summer having everyday adventures and getting to know my excellent friends all over again. Also, cuddling puppies and chickens. I’ll be taking my camera and my heart and at least sometimes a friend on a motorcycle or a dog.

"But it sure would be prettier with you."

      Saying goodbye to Norman for the summer seems a lot harder than it should be, but I guess that because I’m really saying goodbye to a new life. Going back home has felt like I’m a puzzle piece that’s been dropped in a puddle—I just don’t quite fit right anymore. So now we’ll just be a bunch of puzzle pieces hanging out, and that’s perfectly fine too. I’m also saying goodbye to my dear roommate, my boyfriend, my studio, my professors, and my new dear friends, but this is temporary. I’m sure the summer will fly by just like the semester. I know I’ll have my bad days, but I’ll be pulled (or pushed?) through those just the same.

Let me know if you would like more lessons learned/Heather Rae's rules. Number seven is "Never, ever, turn down a cupcake." 

I'm also really looking forward to some frozen yogurt with a certain Extreme Friend. 

To avoid a sappy cliché ending, here’s a joke Patrick found on the Internet somewhere: What was Beethoven’s favorite kind of fruit? Ba-NA-NA-NA!

that is all. 

<3 HR